A Humbling Experience

Today is my 30th birthday. I'm still in shock a bit over this fact. I'm happy to be 30, I have a lot to show for my 30 years. A loving, handsome husband, 3 wonderful children, a home of our own and some pretty incredible friends. Not to mention that getting older certainly beats the alternative.

My day started like any others, the kids waking me up. But this morning Justin was the one to wake me up because he was dying to give me the present he got me over a week ago. It was KILLING him to keep it a secret. He made me a homemade card and a $15 iTunes gift card. He has got to be the sweetest kid I know. Hannah had her first sleep over last night with her friend Emalee so they all got up and we came down stairs so I could get them breakfast. After being up for a while, I finally made Brian get up. I was hoping that he would just once, on my "special day" let me sleep in while he got up with the kids, I should have known better!! :) Once I did finally wake him up, he was grumpy. I was feeling like except for Justin my day was starting off pretty crappy. Anyway, once Brian got around and I took a shower, we decided to drive up to Syracuse to this huge farmers market we saw driving through there a couple months ago. However, when we got up that way we were caught in concert traffic. It was insane!!! We decided to go to Dinosaur BBQ for lunch, something we've talked about doing for years. So after fighting our way through traffic and trying to get directions from our phone, we finally found the place. It was packed. But not a long wait so we sat down, yelled our order which the waitress could barely take the time to get and waited for our food. I have to say, it is one place we can say we've been to, but will never return to. The food was ok but not worth the cost, the service was lousy and the general atmosphere to us just seemed rushed. I'm sure it didn't help that we had the kids with us and Caleb of course does not yet know what sit still means. They also didn't ask if we wanted a high chair which I feel is something they should ask when they see people with small children, even if they are busy. Anyway, as we were leaving a gentlemen approached us as we were getting into our car and was telling us how he missed out on the meals they were serving at the mission. Brian told me to give him a few dollars, I only had $2.00 but we had Hannah's left over mac & cheese, that probably wouldn't have been eaten and half a bag of chips that we gave the guy. He was so appreciative and it made me think. We were just complaining about our whole experience and here is a guy who would settle for our leftovers. It made me realize how lucky I am. We were able to spend a day together as a family, go somewhere we've never been and although it may not have been the best experience, we're not lacking for anything. I was thinking that somehow Brian's Mom had something to do with this man approaching us. She was always helping homeless people in Austin. We were forgetting to be thankful for what we have. Anyway, I wanted to share that experience with you. Don't forget to be thankful for what you have, even if sometimes it's not all you wish it was. :)

And here are some new pics too...

I love this picture even though I hate how I look, I love how my family looks together!!

My crazy life

I sit here with a million things running through my mind. This is on top of my normal million things so you can imagine how crazy I must be feeling right now. A few... my internet stinks, for the amount I pay it should work more than 1/4 of the time. My family is all nuts, I love em, but man do they drive me crazy, that includes my husband, kids, parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, sister, brothers, all of them. I'm not "SuperMom". I would love to be and God knows I've tried but I can't do everything right all of the time.

I was watching something recently where this couple was given their own notebook to keep a daily journal and I thought, well that's something I haven't done since I was a teenager and I have a lot of thoughts during the day, a lot of which go unstated so maybe that's not a bad idea for me. But then I was thinking tonight, I have a blog, how much more fun and hey, something to write about. Maybe I'll be on more than once every 2 months, even if no one reads it, I'll at least get to vent my feelings on something, right? And I can type way faster than I can write so I won't get writer's cramp. :) win win all the way around. So here I go....

My grandparent's house (the house I grew up in, but so as not to confuse anyone I will call them grandparents instead of mom and dad) had a sign over the entrance from the kitchen into the living room that said "The hurrier I go, the behinder I get" and that really struck a cord with me today. With 3 kids and how ever many others I end up with during the day, my house ends up looking like something out of a horror film, minus the blood...well most of the time anyway. And it's funny to me how I can clean and clean and clean in one room while my children destroy another. For example... I took the kids to the library today. I want Justin to continue his learning during the summer so he is not behind during his 5th grade year so I thought what a good idea going to the library. Justin picked out a magazine, a Curious George book and 3 Star Wars books. Hannah and I picked out 5 books together that we can read through the week and then take them back next week for 5 more. (We're working on the alphabet right now.) Well, long story short, Justin and his friend Chris used toothpaste on a game they were trying to get to work (don't ask me, seriously) and it was left in the livingroom. So Hannah, who is fascinated with lotions and stuff like that decided to lather her hands and one of Justin's Star Wars books up with the toothpaste. This is as I'm washing dishes and cooking dinner and dealing with Caleb who wanted nothing but to be held since he didn't have a good nap today. So, as I'm cleaning up that mess, Hannah is in the bathroom washing her hands and I put Caleb down to clean off the book, where do you think he goes? In the bathroom with his sister so he can pull all the toilet paper off the roll. I guess I should be grateful that he didn't play in the toilet....again. But dinner is done, Hannah and Caleb are asleep, the dishes are in the sink where they will stay until tomorrow and I can finally breathe!!!

One thing I would write if this was a journal is what a HORRIBLE mother I felt like today. Justin, who is 10, amazingly enough, still believes in such things as the Easter Bunny, Santa Clause and the Tooth Fairy. Well, my poor son has been through a lot with his teeth. The top 4 front had to be pulled when he was 3 or 4 and then he had extensive work done in the hospital when he was 5 (Hannah has followed in his footsteps, she has no top teeth at the age of 4). Last night was the first night he has ever lost one of his baby teeth on his own and guess who "forgot" to come take his tooth from under his pillow last night??? The worlds worst mom!! Luckily, we were able to discuss the fact that he put it under a pillow on the side of his bed and not the one that he normally sleeps on so she was just not able to find it and if he puts it in the right place tonight, she should be able to find it. I think Brian thinks it's crazy I still let him believe in such stuff like that but I say let these kids hold on to their innocence as long as possible. As it is, he's in love with Hannah Montana, won't be long until he's in love with some girl in school....

Anyway, I think that is actually all I can think of right now. It was nice venting a little!! C-ya next time!!

10 Years

This is Justin. 10 years ago today, my care free life came to an end and I became a MOM. The past 10 years have brought so much joy, growing and learning for both of us. I've felt so many things I never knew I could, my heart soaring with every smile and laugh, my heart breaking with every cry and then soaring again with every kiss and I love you. I am so blessed!!! I can't wait to watch my son, my baby, continue to grow into the great man that I know he will be. I love you Justin!!

Time for a change

I was going to post a picture of myself but I just can't bring myself to do it. Since I've been going to the Dr. so much with headaches, they've weighed me every time. This is worse than dealing with the headaches!!! I get sweaty, my heart races, I want to throw up. Put the weight on 150, nothing, 160, nothing, 170, still nothing. OH NO, I'm going to pass out now. 180 and climbing. We hit 189 and I breathe a sigh of relief that it didn't get past 190 but still 189 is too close for my comfort. Now some may say that I just had a baby 8 months ago and I'm not a teenager anymore who can eat or drink whatever I want and have no consequences. But still, I had him 8 months ago, he was almost 10 lbs and I've only lost 11 lbs since having him, something is not right. Then there is the physical aspect of it all. I finally went and bought some bigger clothes because wearing maternity clothes 7 months after having a baby is a bit disheartening. So now I have some comfortable clothes but can't stand to look at myself in the mirror to see how frumpy I look. Even putting makeup on I want to smack the girl in the mirror with all those chins, like what is wrong with you, lose this weight already. So I've finally decided I need to buckle down and do something, that is where you (my 1 reader) comes in. I need you to rally for me. I'm going to try to get on here once a week and talk about my weight, maybe that will help to motivate me, knowing I have someone to share it with. I guess I'll have to get a picture on here so you can see what I'm talking about. I'm going to buy a scale today so I can keep track myself and I'm so glad the weather is getting nicer because at least now I can get out and walk with the kids. Let me tell you that pushing that huge double stroller with those 2 kids is a darn good workout. My goal is to eat a little healthier also. I've been buying fresh fruits and veggies but I will also pick up a bag of candy at the same time....not good. Anyway, time to get to the store. Wish me luck for the week!!! Maybe I'll be at 186 the next time I write... :)

Wow, I'm on again!!!

Yay, so as of 2/20/09 I am officially a sahm now!!! I was thinking before reality set in that my house would be clean, my children would be entertained all day long and take a nap so that I could do some blogging or something else involving some me time.... Welcome to the real world Melissa!! Caleb is all over the place now so I have to keep everything that I'm trying to do with Hannah away from him, otherwise he trys to eat it. Paper seems to be his favorite. But how can you not give this little face whatever it wants?

I also thought that my laundry would be "caught up" and I have since discovered that there is no such a thing. I can do 10 loads only to find that Brian and the kids have created at least one more for me. However, I have discovered that I truly love it. I love being able to say I got to see Caleb stand up for the first time or try to say uh oh or DaDa. He has been climbing the stairs and I got to be home for that. Although I miss the world of adult conversation, I get to mold my kids into the adults they will become, hopefully I'll do a good job at it. I think I've done ok so far. Justin is a good kid!!

And then there is my princess Hannah. She is the one that actually keeps me busy the most!!! Of course I guess at almost 4 that shouldn't be surprising. I can't wait until the weather is nicer so we can go outside and play. I'm very excited about this!! I wasn't sure how I would actually feel because I've never not worked but I'm truly enjoying it!! How could I not when I get to see this beautiful smile everyday...

Well, hopefully now I can write about my adventures in mommyland and post some pictures more often!! Here is a great one to get you through to the next!!